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Showing posts from September, 2020

Do not go outside

Do not go outside.. Please? Once you're outside you're just gonna hurt yourself Either that or you hurt another people Do not go outside.. Please? There are no lights along the pavement The darkness will eat you alive Do not go outside.. Please? Once you're outside, you're gonna get lost You never find your way back since you don't have any map You cannot scream or search for help cause you are alone And you're just gonna wander deeper and deeper Helpless So do not go outside... Please? I'm begging you

To a Girl Named A

I had gathered all the courage that were not even there to begin with To wrote this letter in hope you will read it one day Since I am a coward, I am no man of courage My guilty conscience kept me awake the whole time last night She invited the dark to come play along The dark has always been there since three years ago Last night, I was afraid that they'd consume all the good thoughts I was scared, knowing they could take over all the bright places and suddenly it's just the dark But without me.... I wrote this in hope they will leave me alone one day To a girl named A You're the strongest person I've ever known You taught me much about forgiveness You told me not to wander too far since I did not bring a map You reminded me to be content with what I have I'm sorry It was my unexpected presence that hurts you in so many ways It added another pain when you've got too many already But you did hold on a while longer You've fought the toughest battle See? You...

To them, to me

To them, love is adequate A tender loving gaze A sweet smile Or a warm hug A heart to heart talk over phone A goodnight text A lullaby before drifting to dreamland To them, love is confusion The hesitation before sending the goodnight text The moment of doubt where each questioning their feelings The agitation when receiving a call The insecurities about everything To them, love is..... Love For she was his knight in shining armor For he was her safe house For she is a blank pages, wanting to be written For he is a drying root, needing to be watered To me, love still is a mystery That I will never want to solve Let it stay hidden...

Egoism

It was 12 in the midnight and here's a snippets of my conversations with olipp Nat Mau deact aja dari dunia boleh gak sih? Olip Jangan, nanti gue kehilangan. Gue gak mau kehilangan orang orang disekeliling gue... Egois ya? Nat Ya dua duanya egois lah lip... Olip Hah? Gimana gimana? Nat Ya kalo gue mau mati gue yang egois, lo pengen gue gak mati lo juga egois. Pada akhirnya emang manusia itu egois Olip Iya juga ya.. Masuk akal

And so the time has come

Autumn is here And so the time has come For the roller coaster ride Tell me Will it always be like this? When the leaves start to fall When the sky decided to go back and forth Between cloudy, rainy or windy Will it stay permanent? Tell me Why autumn has become my love and my hatred Perhaps it is because I was born in Fall That is when the leaves start to fall And so does my emotional well being How long will it last? A moment where counting nights of anxiety attack has been taking over Which I will never be ready For when the time has finally come When I start to hurt myself again When I start to hate myself again When I start to blame myself again As a finale I should have died years ago